farpitzs.

i recently had the pleasure of interviewing the waffles girls, of underground t-shirt line waffles + falafels fame. founded in 2005, they have steadily gained popularity on the west coast. though it was created by an ex-graffiti artist on a whim, eight quirky females currently represent the brand.

1. what do i have to do to become a waffles girl? pretty much everything warren g mentions in the song ‘regulators’ is a good start. gymnastics skills are encouraged too but not a pre-requisite. basically we love stunts so at the very least u should be able to jump outta things without holding your kneecap after and crying.
2. how many girls do you need to complete global domination? enough to fill a spaceship. not a death star but a mid- to large-sized craft for sure. the kind u could live on for years without knowing everybody, that has cool walkways with robots zipping around at your feet that do chores and delivering drinks and stuff. there’d be bars too, but those would be humans-only. no oil martinis.
3. aside from the blatant screenprinted t-shirts of girl power, what is the overall inspiration of each new line? every design has an inspiration, sadly none of which is purple drank. but we’ve done stuff inspired by everything from rococo-era france to disney classics to taking wrong turns and having to pull over and get directions from crips selling bootleg football jerseys in an abandoned south central gas station. there’s always a backstory. if u look closely, you’re bound to find something in our designs that’ll make u go “wtf” a few weeks later. or if u stare at it long enough, it might just transform into a talking loveseat like those 3d art things but that would be more up to u than us cuz we’re just not that sophisticated… yet.
4. with a motto of “real girlz do real thingz”, what exactly are you doing? the goal of waffles+falafels is to showcase creative girls who aren’t just pretty faces who wanna take control. we try our best to get everyone involved in the business, and if that’s not possible, we just support the hell outta whatever they’re into. like i’ve been involved in the creative side of the business, some of the other girls do p.r. and marketing, and we all push sky ferreira’s music as much as we can.
5. what plans are in play for the future of waffles+falafels? staying dope, staying fresh… gotta give the “trendsetters” something to copy right? oh and we wanna institute a popsicles-only for breakfast rule. what do ya think? as for new things, we just started making moves in australia so we’re pretty excited about the prospects of getting our very own bindy Irwin. and we’re working on some crazy accessories and designs that should be out soon. music-wise, the get ‘em mamis, simone and sky should all be dropping some really nice beats in ‘09. should be good year.
6. though your creator is a member of the male species, the brand really signifies the empowerment of cute girls everywhere. how do you all feel about guys, though? this isn’t about the feminism of the early 1900s, i want to know what your feelings are about the gender divide. or, is there not one? what’s a divide? kidding, kidding. we’re cool with everybody. like we love guys! and we love being associated with girl power; its crazy flattering. but the truth is that we’re really about family. the waffles girls are spread out geographically but we’re bonded by creativity, and work together to help each other get our work out there, regardless if its under the w+f brand or not. its like the godfather. u can try to get out, but we’ll keep pullin u back in.

after all that, i still forced them to do some mind exercises:

1. it’s a friday night. what are you doing? making frakencandles, eating franken berries. stomping around town, from bar to bar to see some crummy little band play. i’m eating candy till i can’t move. sitting in my room trying to figure out if it’s possible to put more stuff on the walls while watching every courtney love interview i can find on youtube. i’m taking the first train to who-knows-where.or building that flying elevator from willy wonka so i can transport to my favorite spots for cheap sushi and cheaper drank. i’m asleep under my desk and the sky is falling; another meteor shower.
2. you just inherited $5m. yeah, it’s an odd number, but what is the first thing you splurge on? combat boots. and i would build a room full of candy packed to the top. haven’t figured out if this is lethal yet so i might need to invent some sort of special breathe-eat-simultaneously-tank. actually yes i will definitely need to invent that. for safety reasons of course. oh and i’d set up a ladder in the hall u can climb like a tree fort, except you’d end up in a crawl space up high with a big opening that u can jump through. directly into my life size ceiling high candy pit!
3. you’re in a candy store. what is the first thing you shove into your mouth? depends where i am. does an archie double digest count? if its 7-11 i’m going for stale sour keys preferably the ones with three colours or the ones with the most green. if its england, they have hilarious candy bars so probably one of those. basically i’m a certified candy junkie. i haven’t gone 24 hours without candy literally for years.
4. what movies does a waffles girl have in her collection? kamikaze girls! find it, watch it, deal with the subtitles. bad 90’s teen movies are secretly the best. almost famous is one of our favorites, trainspotting, jackass, rocky horror, gia and pretty much anything by wes anderson, the royal tenenbaums especially. or go and buy green hair dye and clippers then watch tank girl and ghost world back-to-back! scarlett johansson’s voice was amazing in that. she sounded so bored lolz.

(side note: the girls are still looking for some new members to join their team. apply asap.)